tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593899473686096155.post5228633529677917131..comments2013-05-07T19:21:11.935-07:00Comments on Becoming I: A Spiritual Journey: AUTOLYSIS PIECE FEBRUARY 2012gillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05449129835041850860noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593899473686096155.post-28657084013529006802013-05-07T19:21:11.935-07:002013-05-07T19:21:11.935-07:00Who am I, and the questions just pile up one after...Who am I, and the questions just pile up one after the other. I get it, I think, and think, and try to get over it, give up control. But control to what? I still know something, I am not done. I must be willing to sacrifice, sacrifice what? Ego is not real, cannot kill that which is not real, so then "kill the part the identifies with it?" that makes more sense. Well it doesnt, and then it kind of does. I know what you are going through, alas I am not alone, but I must be. I looked at the idea that I control my body the other day, the belief, try it. You cannot know , you cannot know if the thought is just add lib to the whole thing, heck I don't even know what thought is anymore. Its a dark hole, and I am alone, and it drives me crazy because I don't think I can do anything about it, any attempt to get out just sinks me in deeper. Not as depressed anymore, I surrendered to the hate, accepted it. It helped. It was odd, it did not matter what the voice accused me off, only that I accepted it. There are different parts, or maybe not. Fear, thats why I came here, I searched to solve fear. I must remove the fear, I am the fear, I just cannot see it, I am looking through me, and there it is. I am fear. It has a shape in the mind, have you noticed, its the shape that makes it scary, not the picture. Maybe. Fear, it has been a year, any hope on fear? Have you solved fear, is there a solution or will I just kill my health enough to find out for myself. Sinking, just sinking, and even my happy moments are tainted, the inner thing reminds me. I get the bliss part though, the bliss part is amazing, I thirst for it. Fear any hope on fear?No Namehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15847293894475301652noreply@blogger.com